Where is my mama? she doesn't want to talk to me :( Shes probably pissed because we had a misunderstanding. She is such a sensitive human being. That is my conclusion. But whenever this happens i explain my actions and then next day or 2 we would resume our normal chitchats.
Currently I am tired. I feel tired. Think I've had a long weekend. Well it did feel long...
On Thursday boss says I dont have to come to work on Friday, so basically my weekend started since then. Friday night I was invited out by Ivana to join her and her friends that were travelling and happened to be passing by KL. So around 9pm, I was on my way to her place where she came down to get me. Her friends had gone out and were on their way back. In the mean time we just chilled in her apartment and had a few drinks while listening to music and smoking a few ciggs. in the toilet.
"Some feelings don't go away, they just get avoided." -Unknown
Their taste of music was interesting. I mean i like it. Sort of like the new hiphop style, but i was surprised to find out that Germans or Europeans would be into that! im so ignorant. it was nice though. We had a few laughs and what not, her friends joined shortly, they had dinner and we just hung out till everyone was ready and we were on our way.
Went to Changkat, Havanna..ofcourse ;P then a place called Elixir. After that got into a cab and it was around 1-ish? and at that point i thought we were going home but to my surprise they said ZOUK! yay. This was my first time in Zouk. Heard alot about it because, yes its quite famous among party people here and all that jazz, but never been there because it was either i was under age or my age was fine but i was with under age people. haha
"Like a person because they are worthy, not because you are lonely." -Papaya
So you see, I just did a quote. Lie! HAHA I slightly played around with the words of a cheesy quote from an unkown author. There are some advances in the heart region over here. I feel its becoming stronger. In a good way, for me.
So finally I made it there. Ivana, turns out didnt really like the kind of music they were playing there, I think rootz would be great for her. I like it. Anyuway one of her friends was actually alright with it and im alright with what seems like almost all kinds of music. Ofcourse i wouldnt wana be hearing like Indian music or stuff like that. Im not ok with that. I dont ever want to go to a club with Indian music. I dont like it. its not fun for me.. Been to a place like that before and I didnt really enjoy. so yea im fine with anything just dont play that hahaha or oldies music. 90's music. dont do that. but i guess it also depends on the mood. if im going to just be seated then fine, but if im going with the mentality of maybe dancing then no!
Anyway Zouk. Was interesting. very crowded. Chinese people everywhere. I swear they love to drink and party! They are everywhere! Good for them though :) I mean if it makes them happy! None of my business anyway. They had like mini different parties in there with different music. very cool. Its like a maze in there. very easy to get lost!
"You deserve someone who knows how to make things up again after making you feel bad.Not someone who's very good with just the word, 'Sorry'". -Unknown
First of all I feel the need to explain to myself that the above quote is extremely cheesy. Yes it is. But its nice in a weird way. Different perspective and I like different perspectives. Generally I am very welcoming of different perspectives. They entertain me and expand my thinking box. So i like it.
But there are some things i need to point out in the quote. Why you gotta go through all that!! haha. Why let someone make you feel bad in the first place??!!! You deserve someone that knows how to make things up again...Wait, Stop. You deserve someone that doesn't even have to make things up again. Hello! But regardless its not so bad. I mean lets be realistic, people will always manage to fuck up somehow, Its true because one can never find someone that has everything exactly the way they want them to be. So just cut it short and learn to accept people. Love them, make them feel good about themselves, and if they have flaws? kiss them :) Just kidding but no kiss them. No seriously, if they have flaws? Highlight their good stuff and help them overcome, improve if they want. I mean if they are serious detrimental flaws or whatever...
Speaking of which, I realised recently, That I really hate it when someone makes me feel bad about myself. I mean obviously its not something anyone would like but i wont let it pass. Not any more, especially if we are 'friends'. It will makle me think. If they are right, then fine things can be worked out and adjusted but to make me feel bad about mysself and make me feel like 'oh its just sumaya nevermind'? Are you mad!!!?? Then you dont have a place in my life as well. If you ever feel liuke you could contsantly postpone on me, and make excuses, because i will understand and it will reach a point whereby it will get to me, and i will feel bad about myself. This has no place i n my life anymore. I do not entertain such noinsense. I dont need som eone to make me feel bad, I can feel bad about myself all alone. I canm feel bad about myself by myeself. I dont need or want someone to do so or help me do so. You think you have something better to do? No problem at all :) Good-bye.
Anyway my feet were killing me. Luckily I had some flats in my bag and I just smoothly changed my shoes. The girl was impressed haha. High heel problems!
"I wish I knew how to make you want to be with me forever." -Unknown
So ma'am/sir, I have news for you. You are with the wrong person! Please stop this nonsense and get busy. looking for the right person if its bothering you too much.
I was feeling a bit awkward because Ivana is my boss and I had to sort of hold back but she is very cool. coolest boss EVER! and im the luckiest. I'm getting spoiled too much. I must do well. I should repay her for her kindness by taking this job very seriously. And I love it so it shouldn't be an issue at all :)
Im so grateful. Its amazing. Im amazed. Im in awe. Thanks..
Saturday I met Patrick, He made me realize, well actually just confirmed not made me realize, that im a sapiosexual. That is, to be attracted to intelligence or someones mind. I already know this about myself. And my ex is a proof. I just love a man that knows his sh&%. Also being a bad boy and a smart ass? I'm dead. But no, we shouldn't limit ourselves, or what we think we like or we don't. its not right..
"I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me." -Hunter S. Thompson
" – For the record, I don’t agree with this statement, I do though understand the sentiment behind it. At some point in life we get caught up in the day to day and complain about a lack of ambition or inspiration. Falling into a routine can limit creativity and ultimately hurt the work of a writer. While Thompson suggestion is one method, an alternative could easily be adding in changes to your set routine. Take a different route to work, go the gym later or earlier, experience art that you’re not familiar with. Basically, live life to the fullest." (http://wordables.com/5-quotes-by-hunter-s-thompson-only-writers-will-understand/)
I was just recently and briefly reading about this guy and Im very intrigued. Seems like he was a very passionate mister with a wild mind! Very Interesting and I totally agree with the writers explanation and point of view on the quote.
Moving on... So Patrick was an interesting character. He is currently pursuing his masters in Canada but came here to intern for an NGO in Penang. Ge this, he studies sustainable management. Was speaking to Nuha today and she goes like where was he in our final year? haha. My final year project was on sustainability and he would have actually helped me a lot, or just made things much easier for me. but its alright, It worked out well regardless. He has a huge tattoo on his arm with the recycling icon. So nice! He is actually almost like a hard core environmentalist. I dig, but sort of difficult but i dig. Haha
"Close some doors today, Not because of pride, incapacity, or arrogance, but simply because they lead you nowhere." -Paulo Coelho
Paulo Coelho MY MAAAAAN!
So that was my Saturday. Sunday was just a chill day. I TRIED to do some work, but honestly my laptop is making me flip!! Its so annoying, I cant do much with it. 1. Can t move it around. 2. its very slow. So i whatsapp-ed Denys asking if he could come help me do something to try and speed it up. Then as if my boss magically sensed my struggle. She whatsapps me shortly afterwards to tell me they might buy me a new laptop next week. They're awesome. Of course it would be company property but doesn't matter id be using it, so that should be good.
This thing is just holding me back, I need something a bit faster and i personally really cant afford anything now. Maybe next month id fix this one properly or see if I could try and buy another one. Even a lightly used 2nd hand one wouldn't be too bad.
"It is both a blessing and a curse to feel everything so very deeply." -David Jones
I can relate.
Its Tuesday. And then as i wrote "its Tuesday" that Drake and the mckonan guys (is that how u spell the name?) song came to my head. No we are not clubbing though, just home feeling gloomy and broke -_-. hahah
Im tired of running around embassies, this better be worth it. Anyway funniest situation ever happens today. Funny and just awkward. Im at the Singaporean VAC submitting documents to process my visa so of course they're going through the papers and all that. then they take a look at the invitation letter Ishpal sent us and they tell me the handwriting of the first part is different from the second. So she goes on to say that if I insist on giving it that way, they don't mind but they advice me that I should ask the sender to re-write it by himself.
Now, i had only one hour remaining and i really cant go all the way back there again so I asked her to wait so I go on to call Ivana. And we both laugh awkwardly and she says let me check with him and ill call you back.
"The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time." -Mark Twain
So shortly afterwards she calls back and says that he said he wrote it on his own. Now I really cant argue because Ivana is my boss (managing partner) and Ishpal is also one of the partners of the company so if they tell me its written by him then its written by him! Are we going to tell him he's lying? And honestly even asking them to re-send it to me again was already awkward enough so i just quickly explained to her what happened and told her that id just tell them that he says its him! and that if theres anything they should call him.
While I was seated outside waiting for Ivana's call, I had a little chat with the guard. He told me one of his sons was doing his PHD and is now a lecturer in one of the universities in SG. We were talking about how expensive it is there and he says that if you work there its actually not so bad because you also get paid well. So high salary and high living expenses sort of balance each other out. He then told me that his son gets paid 40K+ per month. Sing. Dollar. And I was thinking, If i get paid that amount of money, why would i let my dad work so hard? Of course the man could be bluffing, but i chose to give him the benefit of a doubt. Weird son.
I need a back up place to go to but I really would prefer if I could see somewhere else also other than Lao! Lets see :)
"Forever is composed of nows." -Emily Dickson
I need to come up with loyalty program ideas for a cafe shop. Memership cards/food and drink. I havent researched anything yet but I already have 2 ideas from talking to friends. Lazy? or just trying to research in a different way? let me be nice to myself and say the latter is on point! ;)
Its become an old story, but I still miss you. I miss you so much and I realise how much I do, when I start thinking about it. And it scares me. So I have no option but to try and not remember you, and ive gotten better at it. I want you to be happy but I hope you never forget me. Was it that simple.. This is a question and id love to know its answer. But it doesnt matter does it? It doesnt. Its just that, I was too attached to you. I thought you were a constant. The thought of ever losing you used to bring tears to my eyes even when u were beside me. Literally. And I used to tell you, I remember. You'd say you're not going anywhere :) Now your not here. Im happy, regardless, but sometimes when I close my eyes, I still remember your face, how you talked, your voice, your laugh. I just miss you and I can never tell you. I hope you are happy, Because I am. I am grateful for all thats going on, I am thankful. So you see, Its very weird. Different. I know how it feels to lose someone dear to you to death. Its the same. Same situation I guess. Im being too dark right now and i dont even like this topic but im editing my post now so yahh. Moving on!!
"But what minutes! Count them by sensation, and not by calendars, and each moment is a day. -Benjamin Disraeli
I was out with Ivana again yesterday. Less awkward this time around. Im having fuuuun!! :D and being too spoiled haha. We sort of clarified things yesterday, we can be friends and already are but when its business time we will not joke around. and thats how its been. Business is business, and I told her that I am willing to leaaaarn! Im open and i am willing. I am trying and I told her I wont take it personal if she just speaks her mind to me. Id prefer it that way actually. Im just starting my career and ofcourse im not a pro at anything yet! I will make mistakes and i will want to be corrected and all that sort of things. So she totally understood and also told me that she is that way anyway. So we have a good understanding. She is a great woman, Beautiful, smart, brilliant, intelligent, hardworking, focused, diterminant, and just alot of awesome things. Good company! Cheers. Im looking forward and I will push myself and do my part :) Happily. Such a lovely person. I admire her. Can I be youuu? I said. HAHAHA, jokes :)
"She always that had about her, that look of otherness, of eyes that see things much too far, and of thoughts that wander off the edge of the world." -Joanne Harris
We are travelling together soon, for my visa. Short trip but will be fun. Yesterday we met with some other guys from San Fran. Interesting lot, but they went to eat then went home to sleep meanwhile we decided to party on. I mixed so much. Note to self: Never do that again. That much. hahaha but all was good, except for the exhaustion today was unbelievable ofcourse. I woke up like whats going on? Whats happening? what am I supposed to be doing? lol Basically I was wasteeed and needed to chill. Thing is im always chilling. No not really but ima start being more and more active. Thinking of gyming 3-4 times a week? get back to my old track. Should be good for me if i do so. Good for my creativity also maybe.
I keep on forgetting. Today I was standing outside 1 utama's new wing waiting for a taxi. I already thought the taxi i took previously would be around because i asked him to wait for me. there was a line of 2 other taxi's so I asked the first guy and he says 10RM. my response..Why? So he just said because like that lol. No reason. I gave him a bad look and decided to look around for another because no way on earth was i going to give you 10rm for a ride i know costs less than 5. no waaay! I could even walk but the sun was too hot and i was thirsty. So the 2nd guy i asked, they seemed like friends because they were talking to each other and he says same price. At this point i was just wondering, like why you tryna cheat me?> dont you want work? why are you driving? waw. So my response was the same and he then explained that if they go there they wont get customers coming back. Not my problem!!
" We need women who are so strong they can be gentle, so educated they can be humble, so fierce they can be compassionate, so passionate they can be rational, and so disciplined they can be free." -Kavita Ramdas
Anyway so I said 10rm is too much. Ridiculous, and as i said that I happened to turn around. Now the man took offense, and decided to make it a fight. sort of like a conversation but an angry one. So i was sort of intrigued. Like what are you even wanting to argue about? it is ridiculous! We both know it, anyone that hears the story would know it. What do you want to talk about. so I fixed my posture, because remember i was turning around and getting ready to walk away, so i get closer and i had this smirk on my face like ok what do you want to say, no problem. I understood the man just wanted to talk. Out loud! haha. and he was clearly friends of the guy i gave the nasty look to earlier so fine no problem bring it on. I heard him but not really heard him, then said i could actually walk, its not far distance, 10rm is just too much. so he says "Then walk!." Seriously bro. what was ur problem. I just shrugged my shoulders and i turn around to go inside the mall to the old wing where i could find other taxi's and as i turn around, people were actually staring. A guy that seemed like he's been watching the entire thing raised his eyebrows like what was that? haha. Exactly. I was right. Ridiculous. They were, the prices they both gave me were, and the conversation was. Stupid people wasting my time -_-. Moving on! hhaha
"Tell me every terrible thing you ever did, and let me love you anyway." Unknown
:)
Good vibes, and positivity all the way and all around me.
Xx
Thursday 16 July 2015
Tuesday 7 July 2015
Exalted
I am forever grateful and thankful.
This will be a short post.
I spoke to a beautiful woman, sometime last week. We had a short conversation whereby we both introduced ourselves briefly. She asked what are you doing here, are you studying? And I told her that I used to study here but that I've graduated now and I'm looking for something to do. One thing led to the other and she tells me she just moved here, and there are actually some job openings in their company, and that I should perhaps try and apply.
So I send her my C.V, turns out she personally is the one that reviews C.V's and sets interviews and so on. Basically it turns out that she is the one that handles all these things!
To top it up, she majored on the same thing I've majored on, and if I'm to be accepted id be working with her. First of all, The company seems really good, a start-up yes, but one that has potential. I started liking the idea. And was even liking it more because i get to work with an IBM person (International bus. mgmt.) since I've never! I've never even met a working IBM person before! Man! so my thoughts were, this is perfect. Also the place is not far from where i recently moved to. Please let me get it.
She said she would contact me soon to confirm the interview.
It was set for Tuesday 7th of June. I was very nervous. I wore a red shirt that i normally sweat a lot with. I normally sweat a lot and the material is not so good, makes me sweat even more, and then I'm nervous so I'm sweating triple more! Thankfully I had a scarf with me and so i wrapped it around so it wouldn't be too visible XD
I reach the destination, I see her, she waves, there's another man there, I sit down. Now we started talking and at some point I felt sooo hot so while talking i start lifting the scarf so as to be just around my neck. That was embarrassing.
They asked about my visa situation and now that was the scary part. I said well i know its a challenge but i could perhaps leave for a few days and come back every once in a while and so on. She says if we take you, we would probably try and figure out something.
The interview lasted a total of 15 mins. Brief and quick.
2 hours later, Im welcomed a board. I got the job.
Is this real? man, words cannot express my feelings. I have so much positive energy and vibes, i don't know what to do with them! Recycle them XD.
Do good to others and good will come back to you. I testify!
A friend of mine, told me, to take note of whats happening around me. watch and listen. hear the universe, look for signs, during the interview. My reply was ill try! Because even then I'm not sure if id remember my name :'). An exaggeration of course XD.
We were seated at a Starbucks INSIDE a mall. And when i looked to my right hand side, I saw a beautiful little birdie that was inside! So when i got home, i told my friend, this must be a good sign eh?
I am humbled by the power of the almighty. Thank you. I wanted this, I might have even needed it, for now, this is more than I can comprehend. I am truly happy. Whoever reads this, I send you positive vibes wherever you are! Good magical vibes ;)
Do you feel it? I do ;)
Xx
This will be a short post.
I spoke to a beautiful woman, sometime last week. We had a short conversation whereby we both introduced ourselves briefly. She asked what are you doing here, are you studying? And I told her that I used to study here but that I've graduated now and I'm looking for something to do. One thing led to the other and she tells me she just moved here, and there are actually some job openings in their company, and that I should perhaps try and apply.
So I send her my C.V, turns out she personally is the one that reviews C.V's and sets interviews and so on. Basically it turns out that she is the one that handles all these things!
To top it up, she majored on the same thing I've majored on, and if I'm to be accepted id be working with her. First of all, The company seems really good, a start-up yes, but one that has potential. I started liking the idea. And was even liking it more because i get to work with an IBM person (International bus. mgmt.) since I've never! I've never even met a working IBM person before! Man! so my thoughts were, this is perfect. Also the place is not far from where i recently moved to. Please let me get it.
She said she would contact me soon to confirm the interview.
It was set for Tuesday 7th of June. I was very nervous. I wore a red shirt that i normally sweat a lot with. I normally sweat a lot and the material is not so good, makes me sweat even more, and then I'm nervous so I'm sweating triple more! Thankfully I had a scarf with me and so i wrapped it around so it wouldn't be too visible XD
I reach the destination, I see her, she waves, there's another man there, I sit down. Now we started talking and at some point I felt sooo hot so while talking i start lifting the scarf so as to be just around my neck. That was embarrassing.
They asked about my visa situation and now that was the scary part. I said well i know its a challenge but i could perhaps leave for a few days and come back every once in a while and so on. She says if we take you, we would probably try and figure out something.
The interview lasted a total of 15 mins. Brief and quick.
2 hours later, Im welcomed a board. I got the job.
Is this real? man, words cannot express my feelings. I have so much positive energy and vibes, i don't know what to do with them! Recycle them XD.
Do good to others and good will come back to you. I testify!
A friend of mine, told me, to take note of whats happening around me. watch and listen. hear the universe, look for signs, during the interview. My reply was ill try! Because even then I'm not sure if id remember my name :'). An exaggeration of course XD.
We were seated at a Starbucks INSIDE a mall. And when i looked to my right hand side, I saw a beautiful little birdie that was inside! So when i got home, i told my friend, this must be a good sign eh?
I am humbled by the power of the almighty. Thank you. I wanted this, I might have even needed it, for now, this is more than I can comprehend. I am truly happy. Whoever reads this, I send you positive vibes wherever you are! Good magical vibes ;)
Do you feel it? I do ;)
Xx
Lost Frequencies
It is a great thing to have someone or some people that you feel comfortable with and at ease when around. Because no matter what, they will still like you and care about you:). But.. What if i don't want to be liked (by certain people of course)? What if I want to be admired, thought of as different, unique, adored :). Too much maybe, I guess being liked is not so bad. Be grateful? lol.
"I admire people who choose to shine even after all the storms they have been through." -Unknown
I feel like I need something to focus on. Something I enjoy. I mean I enjoy this, but i need to do more things with my hands.. Denys gave me his camera to try and shoot today, I loved it. Its a good way of expressing someones artistry. Good medium i mean. Its interesting, You see people take random shots of things sometimes, and its amazing how a person can then see what they see and how they see it. The entire process i can imagine is fun. Id also imagine myself going on long trips, and taking pictures, then the editing comes, and i think everyone loves to edit, like how we edit our pictures and then post them on Instagram or Facebook and hey i like that too but i really also have an unexplained fascination with colors. I guess i don't express or let it out enough so its just there but yea.
"I just want someone to hear what I have to say. And maybe if I talk long enough it'll make sense." -Ray Bradbury
I'm very optimistic about almost everything. Random (I'm looking at pictures of me we took today and that Bruno Mars song that i used to like but not anymore come on "Just the way you are". He says you're amazing just the way you are, I am! tehehe. I think I'm falling in love with myself. I like her. I'm starting to. And this could be categorized as vainess, but I'm not. Its not, This is not. And i think its important for a person to love themselves. Its important because if you don't, you will never meet your kind of people in this world... And i need to meet my people, I'm already meeting them. But there's more to come :). I'm so happy. Right now. Thats all that matters isn't it...
"Love what you love. Nothing else really matters." -Christopher Poindexter
My best friend was standing behind me, she probably didn't know this paragraph is going to be about her, unless she sees my blog. (If you do, Hi Razan!). She is leaving after tomorrow. Tuesday, just for 3 weeks and coming back. Thing is I'm at a point in my life whereby i really don't know whats going to happen by then. Basically, again, everything will be decided or would be clearer by this coming week. I might not see her again. Ever. Because we don't know how life is sometimes, and sometimes life is like that. You meet, you love, you live, you separate? I might see her again. Regardless, our bond is unbreakable. I never really mentioned her here, but she was one of the first people I met when i first came here. We arrived literally days apart, and we happened to have a similar background in the slightest way possible but enough similarity to be mentioned here. I never liked her, because i stereotyped her. And the kind of stereotype i categorized her under was enough for me to assume and confirm she would not be my type. so my friends would ask her to come over and id curse them secretly, and I just really didn't like her. I was wrong. This is a lesson, and there is a morale in this short story, never judge! never assume! never underestimate! never stereotype!! never stereotype!
Today, we are still friends. 5 years and still more to come because the sit we've seen together is too much to let her go. After my recent bad experience, i was not able to talk to any one. On my birthday, I was out with her, by the end of the night i was pressed, we walked to the toilet where I collapsed. I think that was the day i opened up to her fully about my issue. She hugged me and let me have my space for a while.She was there for me, and she understood, without saying much.
"There is only one success. To be able to spend your life in your own way." -Christopher Morley
We both have our own lives now, our own goals and everything. We are not those typical girl friends. Well to some extent yes, but its even better. We never used to always be together. We don't always talk. Only when we miss each other she would call me because she has those free stuff (idk how to explain, anyway) and id go see her sometimes. But regardless, I knew she was always there, and it gave me some comfort to know she is around and she feels the same way. To know she is there, meaning literally in the same country as me was just comforting ;') and I tell her that. But how will it be now? We both of course used to go on holidays to visit our families before, but its different now, now that i finished and I'm not really sure if i live here or not anymore, its different. I might not see her again. And I might :)
I cried a little and she gave me a lollipop. Such an asshole. I told her i might not see her again, she said we always say we might not, but we are meant to be hahaha. We had a hashtag battle today on a pic she posted, it was hilarious. Like we were 16 years old haha.
Its a new chapter. Whatever it is, it will be fine. right? It will :).
I want to embrace myself more, let go more, be more enthusiastic about things, because what i recall of myself 5 years ago, I was almost like a dead person, but I was I young, but thats the problem! How can you be so young and lifeless! I was dealing with things older than me. way way older. situations.
"I am not an angel; I asserted; and I will not be one till I die; I will be myself." -Charlotte Bronte
I want to enjoy my life in the simplest ways possible. Sit in beautiful places, visit, travel, see things and people, and amazing situations to be experienced that i can talk about and write about. I'm not perfect, who is? its alright. Love yourself and in return you will meet love itself in many forms. People, places, experiences. I see my life going that way :)
I need to focus on getting out of my parents hair. I mean its bugging me a little but that makes me feel good; that I'm annoyed about still living under my parents expenses because that means I'm not comfortable which also means I'm aware its not alright. Its not normal but i guess its alright that they're helping me out a little since i just graduated and its a bit hard meaning it takes time. wait, its not hard, nothing is, that's not the right word, its a challenge. So, that's the first step and I have a feeling ill soon be fully independent MUAHAHAHA!
"You come and the time slips away in a dream. It is only when you go that I realize completely your presence. And then it is too late." -Henry Miller
Was looking through John Lennon and Yoko's pictures. I would like to recreate them with someone I like. Their faces. The expressions you could see when looking at the picture. It was everything. So i would like to do some more reading about them, and listen to more of their music perhaps.
Was supposed to Skype with nuhnuh. We cancelled, every time we set a time or date something happens. I know we will talk soon and we have a lot to tell each other. One of my dearest people. I love her. She said first time her and Amina heard my voice in class, they loved it :'). Strange story but that's what they told me! They loved my voice hahaha not my personality or character or any of the things that really matter just my voice. I don't know maybe because I'm a smoker, I have this strange thing in my voice. Obviously smoking does something to the voice sometimes i guess. Man I should quit. Was telling Denys the other day that when I was in Lao I tried an amazing cigg. a Korean guy gave me. It was normal at first then it has 2 capsules inside whereby you can click and it changes flavors. So get this, first capsule is mint, and second one is GRAPES! WTF!! so I was telling him that if i get a hold of those cigarettes, That would exactly be when i wouldn't quit. Haah. They're a Mevius brand i guess, and the guy told me they're from Japan but yesterday i saw a lady here smoking them.
"She was beautiful, but not like those girls in the magazines. She was beautiful, for the way she thought. She was beautiful, for the sparkle in her eyes when she talked about something she loved. She was beautiful, for her ability to make other people smile, even if she was sad. No, she wasn't beautiful for something as temporary as her looks. She was beautiful, deep down to her soul." -F. Scott Fitzgerald
Anyway, back to my story, So Nuhnuh and Amina are wonderful people but I was drawn more to Nuha, and so we became really good friends. Thing here is that she is seriously and literally a Genius. We were classmates and she was super smart! Super smart as in first class honors. And in school, I wasn't really dumb either but I'm not that smart lets not kid ourselves. I was a second upper class honors, so just there. An alright person. Good. So we weren't exactly like each other and that's always the case with people that i really click with! we are normally different, but there were things where we perhaps were able to relate on with each other. maybe some of our ambitions and passions in life. A little. So we normally talk for hours. Every Friday (sometimes we would skip a week or so, depending on our schedules and assignments, tests etc) we would go to a coffee shop nearby my place and just sit there. It was called King of sheesha, so obviously they had sheesha. we were both new to it but she loved it more than I did. We would smoke, and the interesting part would be picking a flavor, so every time we get a new one :'). Then we order Juice, and they had amazing ones, fresh and so big! Only for 5 Rm. (They closed down after she left and when she cane back for graduation we passed by and they were closed, I told her it was because they knew she was leaving haha). It was good. Then our sleepovers and green tea before bed, also we worked in the library together so we shared that stress haha. She has so much potential and I'm there to motivate. Wonderful girl :).
The other day, I was speaking to Rocky and i don't exactly remember what we were talking about or what exactly led him to tell me this but he said "Everyone deserves or needs a different kind of love". Meaning every one is unique and needs to be accepted and loved for who they are, in a nutshell.
I thought that was a very interesting perspective. Its true :).
Xx
"I admire people who choose to shine even after all the storms they have been through." -Unknown
I feel like I need something to focus on. Something I enjoy. I mean I enjoy this, but i need to do more things with my hands.. Denys gave me his camera to try and shoot today, I loved it. Its a good way of expressing someones artistry. Good medium i mean. Its interesting, You see people take random shots of things sometimes, and its amazing how a person can then see what they see and how they see it. The entire process i can imagine is fun. Id also imagine myself going on long trips, and taking pictures, then the editing comes, and i think everyone loves to edit, like how we edit our pictures and then post them on Instagram or Facebook and hey i like that too but i really also have an unexplained fascination with colors. I guess i don't express or let it out enough so its just there but yea.
"I just want someone to hear what I have to say. And maybe if I talk long enough it'll make sense." -Ray Bradbury
I'm very optimistic about almost everything. Random (I'm looking at pictures of me we took today and that Bruno Mars song that i used to like but not anymore come on "Just the way you are". He says you're amazing just the way you are, I am! tehehe. I think I'm falling in love with myself. I like her. I'm starting to. And this could be categorized as vainess, but I'm not. Its not, This is not. And i think its important for a person to love themselves. Its important because if you don't, you will never meet your kind of people in this world... And i need to meet my people, I'm already meeting them. But there's more to come :). I'm so happy. Right now. Thats all that matters isn't it...
"Love what you love. Nothing else really matters." -Christopher Poindexter
My best friend was standing behind me, she probably didn't know this paragraph is going to be about her, unless she sees my blog. (If you do, Hi Razan!). She is leaving after tomorrow. Tuesday, just for 3 weeks and coming back. Thing is I'm at a point in my life whereby i really don't know whats going to happen by then. Basically, again, everything will be decided or would be clearer by this coming week. I might not see her again. Ever. Because we don't know how life is sometimes, and sometimes life is like that. You meet, you love, you live, you separate? I might see her again. Regardless, our bond is unbreakable. I never really mentioned her here, but she was one of the first people I met when i first came here. We arrived literally days apart, and we happened to have a similar background in the slightest way possible but enough similarity to be mentioned here. I never liked her, because i stereotyped her. And the kind of stereotype i categorized her under was enough for me to assume and confirm she would not be my type. so my friends would ask her to come over and id curse them secretly, and I just really didn't like her. I was wrong. This is a lesson, and there is a morale in this short story, never judge! never assume! never underestimate! never stereotype!! never stereotype!
Today, we are still friends. 5 years and still more to come because the sit we've seen together is too much to let her go. After my recent bad experience, i was not able to talk to any one. On my birthday, I was out with her, by the end of the night i was pressed, we walked to the toilet where I collapsed. I think that was the day i opened up to her fully about my issue. She hugged me and let me have my space for a while.She was there for me, and she understood, without saying much.
"There is only one success. To be able to spend your life in your own way." -Christopher Morley
We both have our own lives now, our own goals and everything. We are not those typical girl friends. Well to some extent yes, but its even better. We never used to always be together. We don't always talk. Only when we miss each other she would call me because she has those free stuff (idk how to explain, anyway) and id go see her sometimes. But regardless, I knew she was always there, and it gave me some comfort to know she is around and she feels the same way. To know she is there, meaning literally in the same country as me was just comforting ;') and I tell her that. But how will it be now? We both of course used to go on holidays to visit our families before, but its different now, now that i finished and I'm not really sure if i live here or not anymore, its different. I might not see her again. And I might :)
I cried a little and she gave me a lollipop. Such an asshole. I told her i might not see her again, she said we always say we might not, but we are meant to be hahaha. We had a hashtag battle today on a pic she posted, it was hilarious. Like we were 16 years old haha.
Its a new chapter. Whatever it is, it will be fine. right? It will :).
I want to embrace myself more, let go more, be more enthusiastic about things, because what i recall of myself 5 years ago, I was almost like a dead person, but I was I young, but thats the problem! How can you be so young and lifeless! I was dealing with things older than me. way way older. situations.
"I am not an angel; I asserted; and I will not be one till I die; I will be myself." -Charlotte Bronte
I want to enjoy my life in the simplest ways possible. Sit in beautiful places, visit, travel, see things and people, and amazing situations to be experienced that i can talk about and write about. I'm not perfect, who is? its alright. Love yourself and in return you will meet love itself in many forms. People, places, experiences. I see my life going that way :)
I need to focus on getting out of my parents hair. I mean its bugging me a little but that makes me feel good; that I'm annoyed about still living under my parents expenses because that means I'm not comfortable which also means I'm aware its not alright. Its not normal but i guess its alright that they're helping me out a little since i just graduated and its a bit hard meaning it takes time. wait, its not hard, nothing is, that's not the right word, its a challenge. So, that's the first step and I have a feeling ill soon be fully independent MUAHAHAHA!
"You come and the time slips away in a dream. It is only when you go that I realize completely your presence. And then it is too late." -Henry Miller
Was looking through John Lennon and Yoko's pictures. I would like to recreate them with someone I like. Their faces. The expressions you could see when looking at the picture. It was everything. So i would like to do some more reading about them, and listen to more of their music perhaps.
Was supposed to Skype with nuhnuh. We cancelled, every time we set a time or date something happens. I know we will talk soon and we have a lot to tell each other. One of my dearest people. I love her. She said first time her and Amina heard my voice in class, they loved it :'). Strange story but that's what they told me! They loved my voice hahaha not my personality or character or any of the things that really matter just my voice. I don't know maybe because I'm a smoker, I have this strange thing in my voice. Obviously smoking does something to the voice sometimes i guess. Man I should quit. Was telling Denys the other day that when I was in Lao I tried an amazing cigg. a Korean guy gave me. It was normal at first then it has 2 capsules inside whereby you can click and it changes flavors. So get this, first capsule is mint, and second one is GRAPES! WTF!! so I was telling him that if i get a hold of those cigarettes, That would exactly be when i wouldn't quit. Haah. They're a Mevius brand i guess, and the guy told me they're from Japan but yesterday i saw a lady here smoking them.
"She was beautiful, but not like those girls in the magazines. She was beautiful, for the way she thought. She was beautiful, for the sparkle in her eyes when she talked about something she loved. She was beautiful, for her ability to make other people smile, even if she was sad. No, she wasn't beautiful for something as temporary as her looks. She was beautiful, deep down to her soul." -F. Scott Fitzgerald
Anyway, back to my story, So Nuhnuh and Amina are wonderful people but I was drawn more to Nuha, and so we became really good friends. Thing here is that she is seriously and literally a Genius. We were classmates and she was super smart! Super smart as in first class honors. And in school, I wasn't really dumb either but I'm not that smart lets not kid ourselves. I was a second upper class honors, so just there. An alright person. Good. So we weren't exactly like each other and that's always the case with people that i really click with! we are normally different, but there were things where we perhaps were able to relate on with each other. maybe some of our ambitions and passions in life. A little. So we normally talk for hours. Every Friday (sometimes we would skip a week or so, depending on our schedules and assignments, tests etc) we would go to a coffee shop nearby my place and just sit there. It was called King of sheesha, so obviously they had sheesha. we were both new to it but she loved it more than I did. We would smoke, and the interesting part would be picking a flavor, so every time we get a new one :'). Then we order Juice, and they had amazing ones, fresh and so big! Only for 5 Rm. (They closed down after she left and when she cane back for graduation we passed by and they were closed, I told her it was because they knew she was leaving haha). It was good. Then our sleepovers and green tea before bed, also we worked in the library together so we shared that stress haha. She has so much potential and I'm there to motivate. Wonderful girl :).
The other day, I was speaking to Rocky and i don't exactly remember what we were talking about or what exactly led him to tell me this but he said "Everyone deserves or needs a different kind of love". Meaning every one is unique and needs to be accepted and loved for who they are, in a nutshell.
I thought that was a very interesting perspective. Its true :).
Xx
Wednesday 1 July 2015
Je suis moi
Is it normal that most times when im sleep deprived i start talking alot and i feel strangely inspired? and when I sleep and wake up afterwards i feel down. Downtime doesnt last long though.
"If you ever want your soul to dance in the clouds, you will at some point have to juggle lightning and taste the thunder." -Christopher Poindexter
Friday was amazing. Denys showed me a place in KL where there was a DnB event being held. Its his favourite kind of music but up until then i havent heard of it before. I do like trance, and those stuff so i thought maybe its similar. So come friday, we did some pre-drinking in pool area and we were on our way!
Pub was a bit empty but we didnt mind at all. a few friends said they would join and they came about an hour and a half later. By the time they arrived me and Denys were good for the niiight. About two D.J's played and around 1 am the real D.J came and by real i mean the guy the event was originally about. every once in a while there would be a surge of what looked like backpackers that would come dance and go. Honestly most of the time the music was very dancable, but sometimes it was a bit too quick for my mood and that was when id sit down or lean on the table as to chill a little.
I thought the first two guys that played were alright, we danced a little and what not but when the real D.J started I knew nothing else. It was the shit. Imagine you are high as f*&% and if you close your eyes you can hear and feel every single beat. I felt like the D.J was communicating with us! He was that awesome. To me it sounded like reggae DnB most of the time, if there is even such a thing but i heard its either Jungle? or Liquid DnB. But I really have no idea, all i know is that I absolutely love liquid DnB from now on .
There was a boy that looked like the event photographer and that guy was just standing near the D.J's deck dancing like crazy! the guy was having so much fun it made me happy! I swear he looked like he was just feeling the music, he was on a whole other level and i remember me and Denys just looking at him. He was trying to take pictures at some point and i was just fascinated by the struggle. I was curious if he'd be able to make it XD. He goes to put those flashy things that flash when you shoot on top of the speaker and goes a bit further to try and shoot and it falls then he goes to fix it the second time and finally it stabilizes. He then asks if he could take pictures of us and i hesitantly agree because i normally dont really like or trust strangers taking pictures of me (might sound a bit silly but i dont like not knowing where a picture of me might end up being-working on it though because really, who cares). He then asks for our facebook names so that we can be tagged and at that point i stop him because no way but i gave him my facebook name nonetheless because i would still like the pics to be sent to me. The guy impressed me, on top of his level of highness, the pics were on point!
later on we find out he was actually the event planner or one of the event planners. and he is a very nice guy. Seems super fun and he tells me he is from Hong Kong :)
I was worried Nad and Eman were not having as much fun as Denys and I were, but they seemed ok after asking them 10 times if they were fine haha. They came with a friend that was named Jack and he was in his own world the entire time. They later told us that he appologizes for being anti-social but he just has a few things he needed to take care of so we were like its alright if he's good! So basically Jack spent the night on the couch drinking a beer and on his phone, but he assured us that he was good :).
"Take a lover who looks at you like maybe you are magic." -Frida Kahlo
It was time to go after taking a few group photos and socialising with fellow party people. Nad, Eman and Jack were driving back and they asked what me and Denys were planning to do so we just told them that we would figure it out, we are neighbours anyway so our route would be the same haha. Said our goodbyes and that was my friday night story.
"Understand me. Im not like an ordinary world. I have my madness, I live in another dimension and I do not have time for things that have no soul." -Charles Bukowski
I promised myself that 2015 would be a year of trying and doing as much new things as possible. In the process, I met people and learnt things, had interesting conversations and laughed like ive never laughed before. Its amazing and the year is not over yet. One of the craziest things ive done was to travel (not really far away but like to different cities and such) to meet people ive only talked with briefly or for a short time over the phone. Ofcourse the conversations must have been interesting or there must have been something i liked about the person or something that intrigued me about them, or again it could have just been a nice conversation that id make such a move.
So I was really stressed out at the time and It was when i first met Mathew. He told me he was going to be in Penang for a few days and asked if I wanted to join. Fast forward a couple of days later im on the bus on my way to Penang! and it was amazing. I remember being a little bit nervous and anxious. Ive always loved Penang, matter of fact ive even considered moving there previously. and so I was like even if he turns out to be a not so nice person (which was not the case at all!) or if the company wouldnt be up to my level of satisfaction or what not id just leave and enjoy my trip alone.
He waited for me at the bus station, I peaked from my window and i saw this handsome guy standing on the pavement and i knew it was him straight away! said our hellos and we were on our way to George town were we chilled for a while at a little cafe till we found a place to stay.
Later we met Dan and a Lisa. It was good. Overall a good experience I loved it all. Moral of the story is when a stranger asks you to accompany them on a trip say yes! No, dont. You must always evaluate a few things before responding, but i guess sometimes luck and fate work together which i reckon is what happened in my case :D.
"I got lost in him and it was the kind of lost that's exactly like being found." -Claire LaZebnik
Dan was from china and he was one of the nicest and funniest humans ive ever met! Also a very curious person and i really dig that. Basically I had great company in Penang and im very lucky. The more people you meet (preferably from different countries, cultures, with different backgrounds and traditions) the more you learn, and the more you expand your knowledge, the more your mind grows and the more your soul desires to seek more. It is simply beautiful. It is a gift from the universe and people should be grateful for such experiences and opportunities because it is like having the world at the palm of your hands.
Dan was having difficulties saying my name and so he settles with susu :'). As payback perhaps, I started calling Matt 'Gummy bear', because his skin was so soft! and it was just a cute nickname (so creative Sumaya, well done). I remember vividly one night we were playing an X O game on my notebook, and gummy bear tells me something.
"Players only love you when they're playing."
I never quite understood, but nonetheless as time passed the phrase made more sense to me. Its very simple. Sometimes people say or mention things that you don't really understand but as time goes on you sort of get it. Or you could just ask what they mean straight away hah.
Randomly, I would like to declare out loud for no particular reason that If a person offends me, I will probably try to not let it get to me, but they will just not see my face again because aint nobody got time for that! (Ideally id like it to be that way).
"She was too quiet or she was too loud. She took things too seriously or not seriously at all. She was too sensitive, or too cold-hearted. She hated with every fiber of her being, or loved with every piece of her heart. There was no in-between for her. It was either all or nothing. She wanted everything but settled for nothing." -Unknown
And then someone comments "She was...bipolar." XD so funny well done.
Saturday was spent lazying around the house and Sunday I went with Denys to buy shoes but ended up buying nothing. We just talked and laughed like we usually do and that was fun. I think thats all for now. Nothing more. I should be taking some professional photos sometime this week and im sort of shy and excited. Im sure they'll turn out looking interesting or at least I hope they do! If not ill just have a good laugh and tell myself that ive tried something new and always wanted, to make myself feel better.
"In a world full of trends, I want to remain a classic." -Iman
I would also like to declare that this post is actually a tiny bit late. As in being posted a bit late. But I guess that is for a reason. I have literally not slept for almost 24hrs now for no reason! This morning i had the most interesting conversation with someone. About spirituality in general. I wont go into details with this, but i just want to say that it was one of the most amazing conversations ive had lately! So much knowledge is being passed to me and i am thankful and grateful! This is exactly what ive been asking for. well one of the things ive been asking for and wanting.
"She was like the moon - part of her was always hidden away." -Dia Reeves
In my entire life there was only one person that was able to have such a conversation with me and that person is not in my life anymore unfortunately because it seems the universe just wants it that way i guess, maybe i would fully understand another time but nevermind, this was crazy! I was literally waiting for this person to dissappoint me because i couldnt believe it but throughout the conversation, I knew that this person knows exactly what they were talking about. I like being spiritual but i am not guru! I know nothing and that is my mindset because i am in a learning phase at the moment. I have things to share as well but i need to learn as well.
People are not perfect. and sometimes we must try and put ourselves in other peoples shoes. Perhaps try to relate. Forgive if you feel wronged and forgive... especially if after empathizing with a person you feel may be apologizing sincerely. And then perhaps something could change. Perhaps the person that may have wronged you, would learn their lesson and admire your forgiveness, and it could change something in them. This may not make so much sense. Total random rant. But i have observed a situation that has recently happened and this point has been brought to my attention. A different perspective maybe.
"Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply." -Stephen R. Covey
Xx
"If you ever want your soul to dance in the clouds, you will at some point have to juggle lightning and taste the thunder." -Christopher Poindexter
Friday was amazing. Denys showed me a place in KL where there was a DnB event being held. Its his favourite kind of music but up until then i havent heard of it before. I do like trance, and those stuff so i thought maybe its similar. So come friday, we did some pre-drinking in pool area and we were on our way!
Pub was a bit empty but we didnt mind at all. a few friends said they would join and they came about an hour and a half later. By the time they arrived me and Denys were good for the niiight. About two D.J's played and around 1 am the real D.J came and by real i mean the guy the event was originally about. every once in a while there would be a surge of what looked like backpackers that would come dance and go. Honestly most of the time the music was very dancable, but sometimes it was a bit too quick for my mood and that was when id sit down or lean on the table as to chill a little.
I thought the first two guys that played were alright, we danced a little and what not but when the real D.J started I knew nothing else. It was the shit. Imagine you are high as f*&% and if you close your eyes you can hear and feel every single beat. I felt like the D.J was communicating with us! He was that awesome. To me it sounded like reggae DnB most of the time, if there is even such a thing but i heard its either Jungle? or Liquid DnB. But I really have no idea, all i know is that I absolutely love liquid DnB from now on .
There was a boy that looked like the event photographer and that guy was just standing near the D.J's deck dancing like crazy! the guy was having so much fun it made me happy! I swear he looked like he was just feeling the music, he was on a whole other level and i remember me and Denys just looking at him. He was trying to take pictures at some point and i was just fascinated by the struggle. I was curious if he'd be able to make it XD. He goes to put those flashy things that flash when you shoot on top of the speaker and goes a bit further to try and shoot and it falls then he goes to fix it the second time and finally it stabilizes. He then asks if he could take pictures of us and i hesitantly agree because i normally dont really like or trust strangers taking pictures of me (might sound a bit silly but i dont like not knowing where a picture of me might end up being-working on it though because really, who cares). He then asks for our facebook names so that we can be tagged and at that point i stop him because no way but i gave him my facebook name nonetheless because i would still like the pics to be sent to me. The guy impressed me, on top of his level of highness, the pics were on point!
later on we find out he was actually the event planner or one of the event planners. and he is a very nice guy. Seems super fun and he tells me he is from Hong Kong :)
I was worried Nad and Eman were not having as much fun as Denys and I were, but they seemed ok after asking them 10 times if they were fine haha. They came with a friend that was named Jack and he was in his own world the entire time. They later told us that he appologizes for being anti-social but he just has a few things he needed to take care of so we were like its alright if he's good! So basically Jack spent the night on the couch drinking a beer and on his phone, but he assured us that he was good :).
"Take a lover who looks at you like maybe you are magic." -Frida Kahlo
It was time to go after taking a few group photos and socialising with fellow party people. Nad, Eman and Jack were driving back and they asked what me and Denys were planning to do so we just told them that we would figure it out, we are neighbours anyway so our route would be the same haha. Said our goodbyes and that was my friday night story.
"Understand me. Im not like an ordinary world. I have my madness, I live in another dimension and I do not have time for things that have no soul." -Charles Bukowski
I promised myself that 2015 would be a year of trying and doing as much new things as possible. In the process, I met people and learnt things, had interesting conversations and laughed like ive never laughed before. Its amazing and the year is not over yet. One of the craziest things ive done was to travel (not really far away but like to different cities and such) to meet people ive only talked with briefly or for a short time over the phone. Ofcourse the conversations must have been interesting or there must have been something i liked about the person or something that intrigued me about them, or again it could have just been a nice conversation that id make such a move.
So I was really stressed out at the time and It was when i first met Mathew. He told me he was going to be in Penang for a few days and asked if I wanted to join. Fast forward a couple of days later im on the bus on my way to Penang! and it was amazing. I remember being a little bit nervous and anxious. Ive always loved Penang, matter of fact ive even considered moving there previously. and so I was like even if he turns out to be a not so nice person (which was not the case at all!) or if the company wouldnt be up to my level of satisfaction or what not id just leave and enjoy my trip alone.
He waited for me at the bus station, I peaked from my window and i saw this handsome guy standing on the pavement and i knew it was him straight away! said our hellos and we were on our way to George town were we chilled for a while at a little cafe till we found a place to stay.
Later we met Dan and a Lisa. It was good. Overall a good experience I loved it all. Moral of the story is when a stranger asks you to accompany them on a trip say yes! No, dont. You must always evaluate a few things before responding, but i guess sometimes luck and fate work together which i reckon is what happened in my case :D.
"I got lost in him and it was the kind of lost that's exactly like being found." -Claire LaZebnik
Dan was from china and he was one of the nicest and funniest humans ive ever met! Also a very curious person and i really dig that. Basically I had great company in Penang and im very lucky. The more people you meet (preferably from different countries, cultures, with different backgrounds and traditions) the more you learn, and the more you expand your knowledge, the more your mind grows and the more your soul desires to seek more. It is simply beautiful. It is a gift from the universe and people should be grateful for such experiences and opportunities because it is like having the world at the palm of your hands.
Dan was having difficulties saying my name and so he settles with susu :'). As payback perhaps, I started calling Matt 'Gummy bear', because his skin was so soft! and it was just a cute nickname (so creative Sumaya, well done). I remember vividly one night we were playing an X O game on my notebook, and gummy bear tells me something.
"Players only love you when they're playing."
I never quite understood, but nonetheless as time passed the phrase made more sense to me. Its very simple. Sometimes people say or mention things that you don't really understand but as time goes on you sort of get it. Or you could just ask what they mean straight away hah.
Randomly, I would like to declare out loud for no particular reason that If a person offends me, I will probably try to not let it get to me, but they will just not see my face again because aint nobody got time for that! (Ideally id like it to be that way).
"She was too quiet or she was too loud. She took things too seriously or not seriously at all. She was too sensitive, or too cold-hearted. She hated with every fiber of her being, or loved with every piece of her heart. There was no in-between for her. It was either all or nothing. She wanted everything but settled for nothing." -Unknown
And then someone comments "She was...bipolar." XD so funny well done.
Saturday was spent lazying around the house and Sunday I went with Denys to buy shoes but ended up buying nothing. We just talked and laughed like we usually do and that was fun. I think thats all for now. Nothing more. I should be taking some professional photos sometime this week and im sort of shy and excited. Im sure they'll turn out looking interesting or at least I hope they do! If not ill just have a good laugh and tell myself that ive tried something new and always wanted, to make myself feel better.
"In a world full of trends, I want to remain a classic." -Iman
I would also like to declare that this post is actually a tiny bit late. As in being posted a bit late. But I guess that is for a reason. I have literally not slept for almost 24hrs now for no reason! This morning i had the most interesting conversation with someone. About spirituality in general. I wont go into details with this, but i just want to say that it was one of the most amazing conversations ive had lately! So much knowledge is being passed to me and i am thankful and grateful! This is exactly what ive been asking for. well one of the things ive been asking for and wanting.
"She was like the moon - part of her was always hidden away." -Dia Reeves
In my entire life there was only one person that was able to have such a conversation with me and that person is not in my life anymore unfortunately because it seems the universe just wants it that way i guess, maybe i would fully understand another time but nevermind, this was crazy! I was literally waiting for this person to dissappoint me because i couldnt believe it but throughout the conversation, I knew that this person knows exactly what they were talking about. I like being spiritual but i am not guru! I know nothing and that is my mindset because i am in a learning phase at the moment. I have things to share as well but i need to learn as well.
People are not perfect. and sometimes we must try and put ourselves in other peoples shoes. Perhaps try to relate. Forgive if you feel wronged and forgive... especially if after empathizing with a person you feel may be apologizing sincerely. And then perhaps something could change. Perhaps the person that may have wronged you, would learn their lesson and admire your forgiveness, and it could change something in them. This may not make so much sense. Total random rant. But i have observed a situation that has recently happened and this point has been brought to my attention. A different perspective maybe.
"Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply." -Stephen R. Covey
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